Wrong Number On A Slow Night

Travis Blair

In the middle of reading the chat room dialogue, my phone rang.
I picked it up and sang "Buenos Noches" into the phone.

A pause followed by, "Hi... Is Molly there?" A female voice.

Bored with the chat room dialogue, I decided not to tell her she had a wrong number.
Instead I said, "No, Molly hasn't arrived yet."

"Hasn't arrived?"

No, her plane arrives at 10:30."

"Her plane?" Confusion had set in.

"Yeah, you didn't think she was driving, did ya?"

"Where's she been?"

"Well, you know Molly. She loves to travel."

"I didn't know that."

I clicked out of the I'm An Evil PopTart chat room and popped into New York Weirdos.
"But I guess you mean where'd she go this time?" I said.

"I guess so." Said with more confusion.

"She flew to New York -- for the audition."

"The audition?"

"Yeah, she's changing careers. She wants to be a Broadway actress."

"Are you serious?"

"Serious as a heart attack," I assured her. A long pause followed,
so I clicked into the Female Chained to a Bed chat room. "And who are you?" I asked.

"I'm...I'm her friend. Jane"

"The one she calls Jane in Chains?"

"Who is this?" She sputtered into the phone.

"I'm Cisco. Her agent.

"Her agent?"

"Yeah, she's letting me live here."

"Live there?" Utter disbelief through the phone.

"Why do you question everything I tell you?" I asked.

"Is this 298-2000?"

"Of course it is. Isn't this the number you wanted?"

"I wanted Molly."

"I don't blame you. I want her too."

"Are you sure this is the right number?"

"Of course I'm sure," I said and clicked into the
Hot Christian Bi-Sexuals chat room. "Are you a lesbian or just bi-sexual?"

"I don't believe there is a Molly," the voice said.

"Then why would you call up and ask for her?"

"I mean I don't believe you know Molly."

"Seems I know more about her than you do, Jane."

"I think you're just wasting my time."

"Oh, it's not a waste at all," I laughed. "Think how much you've learned about Molly."

"But you're making everything up," Jane argued.

"I'm like that, you know."

"So I've deduced."

"Deduced?" I clicked out of Hot Christian Bi-Sexuals and popped into Females For Phone Sex.
"That's a very fancy word for a wrong-number-call."

"I'm gonna hang up now," she warned.

"Any message for Molly when she arrives?"

"There is no Molly," Jane said.

"How dare you make prank calls," I laughed. Then I hung up on her
and clicked into the Jesus Answers Prayer room.
It was a very slow night on AOL.

Travis Blair is a 1969 graduate of UTA with a Bachelor of Arts degree in English.
He has worked in motion picture distribution and exhibition since graduating from UTA.